Someone once told me that I’m a ‘hopeless romantic’.
The idea of all things romantic causes my heart to perform ventricular contractions that are way past its time, and the butterflies in my stomach to erupt like eagles soaring through the wind. Truth be told, I love LOVE!
At this stage of my life, I consider this to be my greatest quality, but a younger version of myself faced some serious trauma because of it.
Have you ever had a broken heart?
Yeah? Me too. It sucks! It sucks so much, there isn’t a word on earth to describe it.
When I was a teenager, I often found myself in “Love Triangles”. You know what I mean, when there is more than one love interest and it’s so difficult to see clear-cut answers, especially when the fog from being on cloud nine with all those emotions blurs your vision. Been there, done that, never going back!
I know you’re all probably waiting for me to spill the tea on the personalities which made up this complicated shape. Because, let’s be honest, a triangle is probably the most complicated shape ever created. There are so many types and they all have all kinds of differences but in the end they are all just triangles. It reminds me of life in some ways; we could all go through the same situation, in different ways, and still end up in the same place at the end of it all.
I was in love with God, in love with myself, and –yes you guessed it– in love with love.
I was playing a dangerous game and got stuck in a tangled web, with no hopes of ever getting out. I was so concerned with finding love, and having a love story to tell the grandkids one day, that I completely missed the greatest love story ever written and it was right in front of me.
People always say that young people don’t know what love is, but I beg to differ.
My Bible clearly tells me in 1 John 4:16, that “God is Love” and the characteristics of love are also clearly defined in 1 Corinthians 13: 1-13. The problem was not the knowledge and understanding of what true love is, because I knew the answer to that. No, the real problem was a case of misplaced love.
Let me explain.
- Love of Love: In all my searching for love I allowed myself to become captivated by whatever, or whomever, my affection seemed to be on at the time. This sometimes clouded my judgement because I was not able to see past the daisies and roses.
- Love of Me: Most of the times my flesh did all the loving for me. If you’re a christian, you know how dangerous that can be because our flesh seeks out the carnal things in the world, which may be satisfying for a moment but leaving you empty the next. I was so caught up in what I wanted sometimes that I couldn’t see that my own desires wanted to destroy me.
My affections were misplaced.
It’s important to recognize that wanting love is not the problem, it’s what you’re willing to give up in order to get it that creates the problem.
Just like age doesn’t bring maturity, love is also not a mater of age. Love must be learnt and love must be chosen. The only way to know true love is to be taught its principles from the author of the meaning of the word: God.
Sometimes we look for love in all the wrong places and are so dismayed when it kicks us in the shin and runs away. I’ve learnt that loving God above all else not only helps me sleep better at night but it also provides the avenue for me to recognize real love in others and be able to reciprocate the same.
The saying is that 2 (2 separate and distinct entities) become 1, , it is not that 2 halves become 1 whole thing; otherwise the mathematical principle of patterns would lead us to assume that 2 halves (1 whole) would become…well, just half.
The void we hope to fill with the search for love in all places can ony be filled by Love Himself. We cannot be made whole by others, nor can we be made whole by the excitement of what we consider the adventure to new love. We must be whole on our own – only Christ can make that happen.